On topic post!

[Trin]

Okies, since it's been a recent comment from Hubby (aimed in my
direction), I figured it _might_ spark off summat other than discussing
viagra or whatever.

I know I've probably asked this before, and I realise that the specific
limits're gonna be different for everyone (ymmv an' all that), but what
would you say constitutes tmi when discussing a relationship (of a
romantic kind) with a loved one you're also in a relationship with?

[Chris Croughton]

On Wed, 12 May 2004 17:16:44 +0100, Trin

Post by Trin
Okies, since it's been a recent comment from Hubby (aimed in my
direction), I figured it _might_ spark off summat other than discussing
viagra or whatever.

Sorry, on-topic posts are off-topic <g>. ((((Trin))))

Post by Trin
I know I've probably asked this before, and I realise that the specific
limits're gonna be different for everyone (ymmv an' all that), but what
would you say constitutes tmi when discussing a relationship (of a
romantic kind) with a loved one you're also in a relationship with?

Whatever makes them uncomfortable, same as with anyone else? Some
people want to know, some don't mind knowing but won't push, some would
prefer not to know details and some will be upset by them. For
instance, I have a friend (no more than that) who's into BDSM, I know
that and am quite content that she enjoys it, but when she goes into
details I am seriously squicked and would much rather not know. She now
respects that, and doesn't tell me more than "I had a good session with
my Master", and that's fine with me.

I don't think that I would even necessarily have the same limits with
different partners, or even with the same partner about differnt
partners of theirs (it might depend on primary/secondary status, or
possible on genders, or on the way my emotional attachment worked, or
whatever).

Talking about the limits with the specific people involved would seem to
be a good idea...

((((Trin))))

Chris C

[Janet McKnight]

And lo, on Wed, 12 May 2004 17:16:44 +0100, Trin

Post by Trin
I know I've probably asked this before, and I realise that the specific
limits're gonna be different for everyone (ymmv an' all that), but what
would you say constitutes tmi when discussing a relationship (of a
romantic kind) with a loved one you're also in a relationship with?

Whatever they consider to be TMI. Really, you *can't* generalise.

Everybody has different limits for different topics, and individual
people's limits change over time, with moods, etc. It's just something you
get a feel for after you've talked to somebody for a while, IME; and even
if you think somebody won't object to something, they always have the
right to say "I don't want to hear this".

This isn't limited to a relationship context, either.